values,  who am I

How to find your inner Kardashian – I mean confidence!

These days, most people know exactly who the Kardashian family is! For those who don’t know, the Kardashian’s are a large, very confident and very self assured family who live in America – who happen to have their own reality show called none other than ‘Keeping up with the Kardashians!’

Kardashians 2013

This blog post really isn’t about the Kardashians as such – it is more about finding your inner confidence.   The Kardashian’s are very comfortable with who they are, and what they are all about.   It seems that each member of the Kardashian family have confidence that could be measured in buckets, actually no – lets just call them tanks, and as a result they don’t seem to be afraid to give their business or personal ideas a go!!

This got me thinking, and suddenly I found myself asking why is it so easy for some to get up on stage and sing, or get up and deliver a talk, do a webinar, or even jump out of a plane?  Obviously, we don’t see them shaking in their boots before they go on stage to do their thing – but it does amaze me that they can actually pull themselves together and summon up the courage to ‘go for it!’ when it is their turn.   They are completely committed to doing their thing no matter what!  I find it a struggle to take a photo I actually like, and I also find it difficult to think of what to say when put on the spot.  Maybe I am too critical of myself – and maybe my goal this next year should be to lighten up!!

With 2014 on my doorstep, I figured it might be a good idea to start the process of trying to become more confident in myself so that I can actually be the best version of myself.  I have noticed that confident people have the ability to strike when the iron’s hot and jump straight in. People who lack confidence seem to allow opportunities to pass them by – so I really need to pull myself together and gain some confidence!!

So I decided to put a list together of ways to increase our inner confidence.   We may not desire to be a Kardashian – but our goal should be to live our best life and do what we need to do with confidence – after all, we are good enough!!.

So how do you grow confidence?

1.  Make the decision to believe in yourself!  Look at yourself squarely in the eye and make this commitment.

2.  Courage is a muscle – it must be exercised to gain mass.  The more you exercise courage the more you will have and the less afraid you will be (preaching to myself here by the way)

3.  Make a commitment and stick to it.   This helps build self-confidence.   Make a plan for an early morning walk – and actually do it!

4.  Realise that confidence is built one day at a time – don’t be too hard on yourself.  Just make a time each day to work on it and watch it grow.

5.  ‘Self-love’ Huni.   Do something nice for yourself (use the good china when having a cup of tea, make yourself a bubble bath, make a decision to stop talking negatively about yourself, go read your book at the beach, buy yourself some flowers, etc). Don’t be so hard on yourself!   Maybe you need to downsize your goals so that they are easier to get accomplish, and then strive for larger achievements.

6.  Help others.   When we help others, we are actually helping ourselves.  Whether we like it or not, there is a chemical reaction in our body that switches on when we help someone else.

7.  Decide to live a healthy lifestyle.  Give yourself permission to make good choices about what you eat and drink and watch how your skin and your body change  (another side benefit of self love).

8.  Don’t sweat the small stuff.   It may be the title of one of my favourite little books – but its so true.  Accept the things you can’t change and put them behind you – keep focussed on the prize.

9.  Allow fear to be a motivating response rather than a debilitating reaction to a problem.  We all have issues we need to put right in our lives and fear can stop us going forward.   I Don’t fear change – change is supposed to be as good as a holiday!

10.  We have to learn to care less about what others think of us and go with our gut feeling.  Realise that our family and friends love us but usually have a different agenda for their lives and at times can seem uncaring or disapproving of our life choices.    I’m learning to run with my desire for my life.

11.  What more can I say!change

Okay!  So you may not want to be a Kardashian, but you might like to live your life with just as much passion, love, fearlessness and enjoyment.  Its time to find your inner joy, grab the keys and get on with it.

Suddenly, I feel a little better about my goals and passions in life – sure I would just die if my life was a reality show – but that is okay, because this family is not meant to be televised! Can you imagine?  Horrified!

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